Wednesday, June 25, 2008
A Short Announcement
I'm not sure how much I will be able to post in July because I have signed up for JulNoWriMo. I should get CD #4 up by the end of this week, but updates might be sporadic after that. All will go back to normal on August 1, I promise.
Friday, June 20, 2008
Baby-Sitters Club #69: Get Well Soon, Mallory
The Baby-Sitters Club was a huge part of my childhood. The first book I read was #13, Good-Bye, Stacey, Good-Bye. I would read it in my first grade classroom after I got done with my phonics workheets (which were really stupid because I obviously knew how to read). The last book I read was #126, The All-New Mallory Pike, and I think I was in high school at the time. I never really had a favorite club member, nor did I really identify particularly strongly with any club member. I related to Mallory because I too wanted to be a writer and I was also considered a huge dork by all my classmates, but that was where the similarity ended.
I'm recapping this particular BSC outing because I happen to love illness/injury stories to an unhealthy degree (ha!). I read this book over and over after I bought it, and I'm to this day disappointed that I never got mono. It went around both high school and college, but I dodged it every time. I'm guessing that being perpetually single had something to do with that.
Several BSC aficionados have pointed out that AMM seems to hate Mallory, and this book certainly makes a strong case for that. Heck, the name "Mallory" means misfortunate! I love how the cover blurb tries to make it sound like Mallory's actually important to the club: "How will the BSC survive without her?" Considering that Mal is only a junior member, I'd say they'll get along fine.
We start with Mrs. Pike announcing that the fam's been invited to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade in NYC. The kids are working on their Halloween costumes. Mal's all run down and vaguely ill and falls asleep constantly. She manages to sleep the whole way through Halloween. Claudia uses the word "catatonic" and I call bullshit because there's no way the poster child for Hooked on Phonics knows a relatively uncommon word like that. I think I had to look it up when I first read this at age 10, and I scored a 650 on the SAT verbal that year. We're now in Chapter 2, and omg, I didn't know that Stacey's diabetic! And get this: Jessi's black! I know! Blah blah Kristy "great idea" blah Stoneybrook Manor blah blah. I hate this subplot.
Anyway, Mal goes home from the meeting and goes to bed. The next morning, she wakes up feeling extremely sick: aching joints, sore throat, swollen glands, the whole nine yards. She puts on her Bad Idea Jeans and tries to go to school. Fortunately, her mother has sense and takes her to the doctor. It's either strep, mono, or a bacterial infection. So basically, it sucks to be Mal. The doctor gives her antibiotics even though the rapid strep test is negative. The antibiotics don't make much of a difference. Mal has a mini-freakout about being behind in her schoolwork. Her parents make Vanessa move in with Claire and Margo in case Mal's contagious. Three days later the doc makes the official diagnosis: Mal has mononucleosis. The only treatment is to stay in bed. Nicky and Claire make fun of her for having cooties. Hee.
Boring subplot, ahoy! Stacey sits for Charlotte. Charlotte suggests cornucopias filled with presents for the old people. Stacey says baskets would work, and hails Charlotte as a genius. Blah blah baskets blah. *yawn*
Back to the Pikes'. Margo and Claire decorate Mal's room like a hospital room. With the help of Nicky, they put on a show called "Mallory Is Sick" (creative, huh?). Mal tries to do homework and drools on her math book. Over the weekend, her mom asks her to watch Margo and Claire. They pretend to be Dr. Margolius and Nurse Tiffany and won't let Mal do anything. In fact, they do a pretty good impression of the female cast of General Hospital. Mal ends up kind of enjoying it.
Sunday morning. Bad news for Mal: the doctor says she has to stay home until she gets better and then she can return to school, but that's it. No extra activities, no sports, and no BSC. Mal, of course, is aghast. She calls Kristy and Jessi to give them the bad news and cries her head off. I roll my eyes so hard they almost get stuck that way.
Jessi goes to an emergency BSC meeting. When she comes back, she lets Mal know the club's decision: nobody can replace Mal. They'll just muddle through without her until she gets better. Mal is totally relieved, because the BSC is life. *sigh*
Monday. Mal visits the doctor, who tells her that it may take up to three months for her to totally recover. Mal freaks out over the thought of missing three months of school and having to attend summer school. She tells Jessi the bad news, but Jessi tells her not to worry about it. Mal starts thinking that maybe the club should replace her. They talk a little about the boring Thanksgiving project that nobody cares about (TBTPTNCA). Mal offers to help make phone calls, but still feels guilty about not being able to do more. Oh, get over yourself. You're not that pretty. You're not that special.
TBTPTNCA headquarters. Goody basket contents are discussed. Sponsorships and donations are discussed. A Thanksgiving-themed carnival for the old people is planned. I'm subjected to Jessi's horribly prissy handwriting. Blah.
Mal decides to be a jerk so the BSC will throw her out of the club and replace her. In what universe do 11-year-olds actually think like this? She pisses off Jessi, Claudia, Mary Anne, and Kristy in short order. However, the big girls catch on and decide that Mal's too valuable to replace. *double yawn*
Vanessa comes up with a "promise campaign" to raise the rest of the money for the baskets. The Pike kids sell promises to their parents while Mal calls the rest of the BSC to tell them about the idea. My book is missing pages 91 and 92, so just trust me when I say that everything works out and they make the last hundred dollars they need. However, Mom and Pop Pike rain on everybody's parade (ha!) by announcing that they won't be going to New York because Mal's too sick. Mal gets all bummed because she ruined Thanksgiving.
TBTPTNCA shopping trip. There is rhyming. Forget that shit.
The Pike kids relay the details of the Stoneybrook Manor trip to Mal. All the old people were thrilled. Old guys were building Lego bridges and tossing bean bags. A good time was had by all.
Day before Thanksgiving. Mal gets to make place cards for dinner. The rest of the kids help with various other jobs. Then the BSC and some random neighborhood kids show up to bring the Manor party to Mal. They give her a basket, let her play the fishing game, let her play the bean bag toss, and hold a cakewalk. Mal cries again, but happy tears this time.
Thanksgiving. Lots of food. Macy's Parade on TV. The BSC invites themselves over for dessert. Dawn calls from Cali. Kristy unveils the new BSC flier and asks if Mal wants her name on it. Mal hems and haws and finally says no. She doesn't know when she'll get better, so for now she's just going to wait.
Yeah, Ann M. Martin? Totally hates Mal.
Boring subplot, ahoy! Stacey sits for Charlotte. Charlotte suggests cornucopias filled with presents for the old people. Stacey says baskets would work, and hails Charlotte as a genius. Blah blah baskets blah. *yawn*
Back to the Pikes'. Margo and Claire decorate Mal's room like a hospital room. With the help of Nicky, they put on a show called "Mallory Is Sick" (creative, huh?). Mal tries to do homework and drools on her math book. Over the weekend, her mom asks her to watch Margo and Claire. They pretend to be Dr. Margolius and Nurse Tiffany and won't let Mal do anything. In fact, they do a pretty good impression of the female cast of General Hospital. Mal ends up kind of enjoying it.
Sunday morning. Bad news for Mal: the doctor says she has to stay home until she gets better and then she can return to school, but that's it. No extra activities, no sports, and no BSC. Mal, of course, is aghast. She calls Kristy and Jessi to give them the bad news and cries her head off. I roll my eyes so hard they almost get stuck that way.
Jessi goes to an emergency BSC meeting. When she comes back, she lets Mal know the club's decision: nobody can replace Mal. They'll just muddle through without her until she gets better. Mal is totally relieved, because the BSC is life. *sigh*
Monday. Mal visits the doctor, who tells her that it may take up to three months for her to totally recover. Mal freaks out over the thought of missing three months of school and having to attend summer school. She tells Jessi the bad news, but Jessi tells her not to worry about it. Mal starts thinking that maybe the club should replace her. They talk a little about the boring Thanksgiving project that nobody cares about (TBTPTNCA). Mal offers to help make phone calls, but still feels guilty about not being able to do more. Oh, get over yourself. You're not that pretty. You're not that special.
TBTPTNCA headquarters. Goody basket contents are discussed. Sponsorships and donations are discussed. A Thanksgiving-themed carnival for the old people is planned. I'm subjected to Jessi's horribly prissy handwriting. Blah.
Mal decides to be a jerk so the BSC will throw her out of the club and replace her. In what universe do 11-year-olds actually think like this? She pisses off Jessi, Claudia, Mary Anne, and Kristy in short order. However, the big girls catch on and decide that Mal's too valuable to replace. *double yawn*
Vanessa comes up with a "promise campaign" to raise the rest of the money for the baskets. The Pike kids sell promises to their parents while Mal calls the rest of the BSC to tell them about the idea. My book is missing pages 91 and 92, so just trust me when I say that everything works out and they make the last hundred dollars they need. However, Mom and Pop Pike rain on everybody's parade (ha!) by announcing that they won't be going to New York because Mal's too sick. Mal gets all bummed because she ruined Thanksgiving.
TBTPTNCA shopping trip. There is rhyming. Forget that shit.
The Pike kids relay the details of the Stoneybrook Manor trip to Mal. All the old people were thrilled. Old guys were building Lego bridges and tossing bean bags. A good time was had by all.
Day before Thanksgiving. Mal gets to make place cards for dinner. The rest of the kids help with various other jobs. Then the BSC and some random neighborhood kids show up to bring the Manor party to Mal. They give her a basket, let her play the fishing game, let her play the bean bag toss, and hold a cakewalk. Mal cries again, but happy tears this time.
Thanksgiving. Lots of food. Macy's Parade on TV. The BSC invites themselves over for dessert. Dawn calls from Cali. Kristy unveils the new BSC flier and asks if Mal wants her name on it. Mal hems and haws and finally says no. She doesn't know when she'll get better, so for now she's just going to wait.
Yeah, Ann M. Martin? Totally hates Mal.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
California Diaries #2: Sunny
First off, I have a confession to make. I have a really hard time with the Sunny books because my dad died of lung cancer when I was nine. He was home almost the whole time. I don't remember much--I was pretty young, and my mom did her best to keep me in the dark--but I remember enough to totally relate to some of what Sunny feels. Therefore, I'm not going to be as hard on her as others might.
October 20, 21, 22. Sunny has insomnia and decides to bore herself to sleep by writing in her journal. She decides to list all her problems sequentially. Number one: her mom is really sick again. She's back in the hospital and the chemo and radiation must stop until she gets better. Number two: her dad is renovating the bookstore and has turned into a control freak. He also spends all his time at the store or at the hospital, so he has no time for Sunny. I have to say, my mom was the same way, only she didn't have an outside job; no, she just neglected me because she had a pretty twisted perspective on spousal responsibility. Next, there's a quick Chapter Two-ish recap of the series so far. I'll spare you. Sunny's parents pass by her room. Mom is angry at Dad (I can't be bothered to write their first names), and she hasn't been wearing her wig. Sunny's afraid she might be starting to give up.
Sunny goes to school and takes the bus to the hospital at lunchtime. Mom isn't in her bed and Dad is talking on the phone about digging. Sunny understandably freaks out, and can't bring herself to write what went through her head. Aww. Mom is wheeled back in and Sunny nearly cries because she looks so old and frail and sick. Double aww. Mom catches on and asks Sunny if she's all right. Sunny makes a really dumb excuse. They get Mom into bed and she asks Dad about the store. Sunny realizes it's late and goes to leave. Once she's outside, she hears the doctor talking about test results. She eavesdrops and finds out that Mom has a lump on her clavicle and needs a biopsy. Sunny curses herself for having hope: "Hope is a disease." God, these books are depressing.
Sunny returns to school and gets in trouble for being late and not paying attention. She tells the teacher that her mom is dying of cancer and she was visiting her in the hospital. The teacher gets all flustered and goes into Sympathetic Authority Figure mode. Sunny berates herself for using her mom as an excuse and even more for saying that she's dying. She doesn't want everybody knowing her private business. She's also sick of her life being on hold because of her mom. She then says something that most people probably think is incredibly insensitive and horrible:
Again, I really can't condemn her for that. I remember feeling that way. One can argue that, as a teenager, Sunny should have the emotional discipline to put aside her own well-being and focus on her mom, but that just isn't possible. No one can do that 24/7. If Sunny wasn't being a self-absorbed, insensitive jerk, I'd be worried. That's how most people deal, whether they want to or not.
October 23. Sunny gets sent to the principal's office for backtalking Mrs. Whalen (hereafter "the Whale"). The Principal, Mr. Dean (I wonder if AMM was trying to be cute with that), goes into X-treme Sympathetic Authority Figure mode and won't even discuss punishment. Sunny bolts and runs into Ducky, who makes her feel better by...well, not doing much of anything. Sunny goes home and gets a phone message from Dad: "Sunny, call me at work. As soon as you get in." Sunny quite reasonably flips out and assumes the worst. When she calls him, she finds out Mom's coming home the next day and he wants her to get groceries. Sunny, again reasonably, gets pissed at Dad. I'm not saying Sunny's totally right about her dad, but she's certainly not totally wrong. Mom calls to ask why she didn't visit like she'd promised yesterday and Sunny feels like a heel. Then she finds out Mom gave her an old music box that belonged to Sunny's great-grandma. Sunny gets upset at the gesture but tries to play it off.
October 24. Sunny finally manages to drag herself out of bed and puts a load of laundry in. She's really not in the mood for the whole school thing. She listens to the radio and gets the brilliant idea of cutting school to go to the beach. She gets on the bus intending to go to the Palo City beach, but she realizes someone might recognize her there. She decides to stay on for the final stop, Venice Beach. I must say, she's got a lot of balls for a 13-year-old. She arrives at the beach around quarter of ten and hangs around for an hour or so before she meets HIM. From the description she gives, he sounds like your standard romance-novel hero: wavy black hair, strong chin, slightly crooked nose, great tan, no shirt. Sunny guesses he's about eighteen. He gives her advice on getting a splinter out of her foot. They sit on the jetty and chat. Carson is a "free spirit" who travels all around, won't give his age or last name, and worships Kerouac. Yeah, this is gonna go well. Sunny, of course, thinks he's utterly brilliant. I think he's a douchebag already.
Anyway, Sunny catches the bus home and gets home around normal time, therefore incurring no consequences for skipping school. Uh-oh. She goes to pick up Mom at the hospital and meets her mom's support group (which includes a flamingly gay man, but Sunny's too young to pick up on that, which I think is cool), who have rented a limo to drive her home "in style." Sunny feels useless and left out and goes home by herself. When she gets home, she watches her mom interact with the support group people, who are all healthy. She tries to imagine her mom that way, but "that [is] much harder to do."
October 25. Sunny is helping out at Dad's store. She finds On The Road and decides that it's a really cool book. As I have not and do not plan to ever read it, I can't dispute her. Sunny gets mad because Dad is taking advantage of her. She goes home to spend "alone time" with Mom but Mom is out with her support group. She finds a box of really ugly jewelry on her dresser with a note from her mother. Sunny quietly flips out about getting more "heirlooms." Meanwhile, Dad arrives home and yells at Sunny for not making dinner. Mom arrives soon after and they get into a discussion about the jewelry. Sunny asks her mom not to leave her any more "surprises." Dad yells at Sunny for being ungrateful. Sunny snaps and runs off.
October 26. Sunny takes off for the beach again, since she won't get to see her mother alone until evening. Even though Carson the Great isn't there, Sunny has a really good time surfing and reading On The Road. When she gets home, she reads to her mom.
October 27. Mom has to go back to the hospital. Sunny arrives late for school, falls asleep in class, and ends up in the principal's office again. Maggie asks her about it and Sunny cracks jokes, which pisses Maggie off. Ducky tells Sunny that he'll give her a ride to the beach next time she wants to go. I think PL is trying to drop "Ducky <3 Sunny" hints, but we all know Ducky's gay and Sunny's his hag, so: good try, guys. Sunny goes home and finds an answering machine message from Dad saying Mom's got pneumonia. Sunny goes to bring her a bag and cries on the way home because everything reminds her of Mom. Awww. Then Dad lays into her for the lack of food and clean clothes. Sunny's dad is an asshole. I feel bad for Sunny, because there's really nothing she can do to make him happy, and I think he is taking everything out on her because she's there. It's a rough sitch to be in. I honestly don't think there's anything Sunny can do, so I can't blame her for getting mad and running away all the time.
Speaking of running away...Sunny takes off for Venice Beach again on October 28. Sunny runs into Carson the Great while blading. They get coffee, which is awful, and CtG praises her for cutting school. Ugh. Not good. They blade for a while and then walk on the beach. Sunny tries to find out Carson's last name. She gets a little bit of Carson backstory--he's 17, a high school dropout, a runaway, and hitched to CA from Cleveland. Can't fault him for that. Sunny dumps on him a little and tries to make plans with him. CtG doesn't believe in plans. I've heard that one before. Sunny thinks she might be in love with him. I gag.
November 1. I'm going in chronological order, not narrative order. Sunny tries to teach CtG to surf. He sucks like a Dyson. Sunny thinks it's cool that he was basically a good sport about it. Sunny's miffed that CtG still won't tell her his last name.
November 5. Sunny forges a note from Mom's doctor to explain away her cut days. Ms. Krueger mildly and unofficially busts her for it. Sunny discovers that forgery is illegal. Um, DUH! Where have you been? At the beach, apparently. Sunny runs into Ducky and asks him for "guy advice." I lol. Yeah, asking Ducky for guy advice is like asking Jill for tattoo advice. Anyway, Sunny asks Ducky if CtG likes her. Ducky kind of answers in the affirmative and Sunny rejoices. Sunny decides to cut school in the middle of the day to see CtG. Sunny asks CtG for his address and phone number, to which he replies that he doesn't have one. That's alternative*. Sunny gives him her digits and he gives her his last name, which is Frame. Dude, I'd ditch that name too. That's worse than mine. Surnames that are also nouns suck.
Later, Dawn yells at Sunny for taking off because Sunny's mom is in the hospital again. Dawn covered for Sunny, but Dawn being Dawn, she's mucho pissed that she had to lie for Sunny. Then Dawn accuses Sunny of not caring about her mom. If I were Sunny, I would have decked her. Sunny doesn't get a chance, because Dawn storms off. Sunny goes to her room and destroys the heirloom music box. Then she packs a bag and gets on the bus, intending to run away.
Sunny finds CatG at the arcade. He gives her some crap about how people are meant to be nomadic. He makes a comment about going to creative writing classes to learn to write like Kerouac. Dude, you could do that with a dime-bag and a steno pad--it's a hell of a lot cheaper. Sunny invites herself along on CtG's life journey. CtG is not impressed. When he finds out Sunny's only thirteen, he's really not impressed. He thinks Sunny is making a big mistake because she has good friends and parents that are still married and still care about her. CtG contrasts this with his own life and it's heavily implied that he was abused. CtG takes off and leaves Sunny behind. CtG sticks Sunny with the bill. Poor Sunny has to give up all her cash. Now she's "broke, alone and homeless." She tries to get on the last bus but can't make it. Sunny realizes that CtG's situation must have been pretty bad--much worse than hers. Sunny's sick of her life: her mother being sick, her dad's demands, how she's misunderstood by everyone around her, even CtG! *gasp*
Sunny notices that everything's closed for the night. There's a sign that forbids camping, fires, and sleeping on the beach. Sunny's in pretty deep shit. She hides under the pier, where it's pitch-dark. She sees a police car and panics. However, it's just picking up two guys with donuts from a convenience store. A minute passes and a freaky vagrant lighting up a cig spooks her. She yells and runs. Someone calls Sunny's name and Sunny looks for the voice. She finds Ducky sitting in his car and is totally relieved. She throws herself on him and bawls. Ducky tells her that everyone back home is worried and Sunny agrees to go home.
Sunny gets home and goes to Dawn's house first because she can't face her parents. Dawn doesn't yell; she cries instead. It's good to see Dawn with perspective for once. Sunny calls her house and Dad cries. Aww! Then Mom gets on the phone and Sunny starts crying. It's a sobfest! Fun for the whole family. Dawn asks Sunny why and Sunny can't answer her. Sunny asks to stay at Dawn's house and Dawn agrees. Dawn talks to Sunny the next morning and tries to understand, but really can't. She's a little cold to Sunny, but Sunny's okay with it. Sunny faces her parents and they at least listen to her and try to be understanding, which is all Sunny wanted in the first place. Sunny laments that nothing will ever be "normal" again.
That's all she wrote! I'm not sure when I'll do #3 - Maggie because my copy is pretty messed up and I might need a new one. I have to check. I may start on #4 - Amalia or I may do some of my library books.
*If you get this joke, congratulations, you're a 90s pop-culture vulture. If not, it's from Daria, the best show ever.
October 20, 21, 22. Sunny has insomnia and decides to bore herself to sleep by writing in her journal. She decides to list all her problems sequentially. Number one: her mom is really sick again. She's back in the hospital and the chemo and radiation must stop until she gets better. Number two: her dad is renovating the bookstore and has turned into a control freak. He also spends all his time at the store or at the hospital, so he has no time for Sunny. I have to say, my mom was the same way, only she didn't have an outside job; no, she just neglected me because she had a pretty twisted perspective on spousal responsibility. Next, there's a quick Chapter Two-ish recap of the series so far. I'll spare you. Sunny's parents pass by her room. Mom is angry at Dad (I can't be bothered to write their first names), and she hasn't been wearing her wig. Sunny's afraid she might be starting to give up.
Sunny goes to school and takes the bus to the hospital at lunchtime. Mom isn't in her bed and Dad is talking on the phone about digging. Sunny understandably freaks out, and can't bring herself to write what went through her head. Aww. Mom is wheeled back in and Sunny nearly cries because she looks so old and frail and sick. Double aww. Mom catches on and asks Sunny if she's all right. Sunny makes a really dumb excuse. They get Mom into bed and she asks Dad about the store. Sunny realizes it's late and goes to leave. Once she's outside, she hears the doctor talking about test results. She eavesdrops and finds out that Mom has a lump on her clavicle and needs a biopsy. Sunny curses herself for having hope: "Hope is a disease." God, these books are depressing.
Sunny returns to school and gets in trouble for being late and not paying attention. She tells the teacher that her mom is dying of cancer and she was visiting her in the hospital. The teacher gets all flustered and goes into Sympathetic Authority Figure mode. Sunny berates herself for using her mom as an excuse and even more for saying that she's dying. She doesn't want everybody knowing her private business. She's also sick of her life being on hold because of her mom. She then says something that most people probably think is incredibly insensitive and horrible:
"Honestly, sometimes I wish Mom would just go ahead and die so we can get on with everything."
Again, I really can't condemn her for that. I remember feeling that way. One can argue that, as a teenager, Sunny should have the emotional discipline to put aside her own well-being and focus on her mom, but that just isn't possible. No one can do that 24/7. If Sunny wasn't being a self-absorbed, insensitive jerk, I'd be worried. That's how most people deal, whether they want to or not.
October 23. Sunny gets sent to the principal's office for backtalking Mrs. Whalen (hereafter "the Whale"). The Principal, Mr. Dean (I wonder if AMM was trying to be cute with that), goes into X-treme Sympathetic Authority Figure mode and won't even discuss punishment. Sunny bolts and runs into Ducky, who makes her feel better by...well, not doing much of anything. Sunny goes home and gets a phone message from Dad: "Sunny, call me at work. As soon as you get in." Sunny quite reasonably flips out and assumes the worst. When she calls him, she finds out Mom's coming home the next day and he wants her to get groceries. Sunny, again reasonably, gets pissed at Dad. I'm not saying Sunny's totally right about her dad, but she's certainly not totally wrong. Mom calls to ask why she didn't visit like she'd promised yesterday and Sunny feels like a heel. Then she finds out Mom gave her an old music box that belonged to Sunny's great-grandma. Sunny gets upset at the gesture but tries to play it off.
October 24. Sunny finally manages to drag herself out of bed and puts a load of laundry in. She's really not in the mood for the whole school thing. She listens to the radio and gets the brilliant idea of cutting school to go to the beach. She gets on the bus intending to go to the Palo City beach, but she realizes someone might recognize her there. She decides to stay on for the final stop, Venice Beach. I must say, she's got a lot of balls for a 13-year-old. She arrives at the beach around quarter of ten and hangs around for an hour or so before she meets HIM. From the description she gives, he sounds like your standard romance-novel hero: wavy black hair, strong chin, slightly crooked nose, great tan, no shirt. Sunny guesses he's about eighteen. He gives her advice on getting a splinter out of her foot. They sit on the jetty and chat. Carson is a "free spirit" who travels all around, won't give his age or last name, and worships Kerouac. Yeah, this is gonna go well. Sunny, of course, thinks he's utterly brilliant. I think he's a douchebag already.
Anyway, Sunny catches the bus home and gets home around normal time, therefore incurring no consequences for skipping school. Uh-oh. She goes to pick up Mom at the hospital and meets her mom's support group (which includes a flamingly gay man, but Sunny's too young to pick up on that, which I think is cool), who have rented a limo to drive her home "in style." Sunny feels useless and left out and goes home by herself. When she gets home, she watches her mom interact with the support group people, who are all healthy. She tries to imagine her mom that way, but "that [is] much harder to do."
October 25. Sunny is helping out at Dad's store. She finds On The Road and decides that it's a really cool book. As I have not and do not plan to ever read it, I can't dispute her. Sunny gets mad because Dad is taking advantage of her. She goes home to spend "alone time" with Mom but Mom is out with her support group. She finds a box of really ugly jewelry on her dresser with a note from her mother. Sunny quietly flips out about getting more "heirlooms." Meanwhile, Dad arrives home and yells at Sunny for not making dinner. Mom arrives soon after and they get into a discussion about the jewelry. Sunny asks her mom not to leave her any more "surprises." Dad yells at Sunny for being ungrateful. Sunny snaps and runs off.
October 26. Sunny takes off for the beach again, since she won't get to see her mother alone until evening. Even though Carson the Great isn't there, Sunny has a really good time surfing and reading On The Road. When she gets home, she reads to her mom.
October 27. Mom has to go back to the hospital. Sunny arrives late for school, falls asleep in class, and ends up in the principal's office again. Maggie asks her about it and Sunny cracks jokes, which pisses Maggie off. Ducky tells Sunny that he'll give her a ride to the beach next time she wants to go. I think PL is trying to drop "Ducky <3 Sunny" hints, but we all know Ducky's gay and Sunny's his hag, so: good try, guys. Sunny goes home and finds an answering machine message from Dad saying Mom's got pneumonia. Sunny goes to bring her a bag and cries on the way home because everything reminds her of Mom. Awww. Then Dad lays into her for the lack of food and clean clothes. Sunny's dad is an asshole. I feel bad for Sunny, because there's really nothing she can do to make him happy, and I think he is taking everything out on her because she's there. It's a rough sitch to be in. I honestly don't think there's anything Sunny can do, so I can't blame her for getting mad and running away all the time.
Speaking of running away...Sunny takes off for Venice Beach again on October 28. Sunny runs into Carson the Great while blading. They get coffee, which is awful, and CtG praises her for cutting school. Ugh. Not good. They blade for a while and then walk on the beach. Sunny tries to find out Carson's last name. She gets a little bit of Carson backstory--he's 17, a high school dropout, a runaway, and hitched to CA from Cleveland. Can't fault him for that. Sunny dumps on him a little and tries to make plans with him. CtG doesn't believe in plans. I've heard that one before. Sunny thinks she might be in love with him. I gag.
November 1. I'm going in chronological order, not narrative order. Sunny tries to teach CtG to surf. He sucks like a Dyson. Sunny thinks it's cool that he was basically a good sport about it. Sunny's miffed that CtG still won't tell her his last name.
November 5. Sunny forges a note from Mom's doctor to explain away her cut days. Ms. Krueger mildly and unofficially busts her for it. Sunny discovers that forgery is illegal. Um, DUH! Where have you been? At the beach, apparently. Sunny runs into Ducky and asks him for "guy advice." I lol. Yeah, asking Ducky for guy advice is like asking Jill for tattoo advice. Anyway, Sunny asks Ducky if CtG likes her. Ducky kind of answers in the affirmative and Sunny rejoices. Sunny decides to cut school in the middle of the day to see CtG. Sunny asks CtG for his address and phone number, to which he replies that he doesn't have one. That's alternative*. Sunny gives him her digits and he gives her his last name, which is Frame. Dude, I'd ditch that name too. That's worse than mine. Surnames that are also nouns suck.
Later, Dawn yells at Sunny for taking off because Sunny's mom is in the hospital again. Dawn covered for Sunny, but Dawn being Dawn, she's mucho pissed that she had to lie for Sunny. Then Dawn accuses Sunny of not caring about her mom. If I were Sunny, I would have decked her. Sunny doesn't get a chance, because Dawn storms off. Sunny goes to her room and destroys the heirloom music box. Then she packs a bag and gets on the bus, intending to run away.
Sunny finds CatG at the arcade. He gives her some crap about how people are meant to be nomadic. He makes a comment about going to creative writing classes to learn to write like Kerouac. Dude, you could do that with a dime-bag and a steno pad--it's a hell of a lot cheaper. Sunny invites herself along on CtG's life journey. CtG is not impressed. When he finds out Sunny's only thirteen, he's really not impressed. He thinks Sunny is making a big mistake because she has good friends and parents that are still married and still care about her. CtG contrasts this with his own life and it's heavily implied that he was abused. CtG takes off and leaves Sunny behind. CtG sticks Sunny with the bill. Poor Sunny has to give up all her cash. Now she's "broke, alone and homeless." She tries to get on the last bus but can't make it. Sunny realizes that CtG's situation must have been pretty bad--much worse than hers. Sunny's sick of her life: her mother being sick, her dad's demands, how she's misunderstood by everyone around her, even CtG! *gasp*
Sunny notices that everything's closed for the night. There's a sign that forbids camping, fires, and sleeping on the beach. Sunny's in pretty deep shit. She hides under the pier, where it's pitch-dark. She sees a police car and panics. However, it's just picking up two guys with donuts from a convenience store. A minute passes and a freaky vagrant lighting up a cig spooks her. She yells and runs. Someone calls Sunny's name and Sunny looks for the voice. She finds Ducky sitting in his car and is totally relieved. She throws herself on him and bawls. Ducky tells her that everyone back home is worried and Sunny agrees to go home.
Sunny gets home and goes to Dawn's house first because she can't face her parents. Dawn doesn't yell; she cries instead. It's good to see Dawn with perspective for once. Sunny calls her house and Dad cries. Aww! Then Mom gets on the phone and Sunny starts crying. It's a sobfest! Fun for the whole family. Dawn asks Sunny why and Sunny can't answer her. Sunny asks to stay at Dawn's house and Dawn agrees. Dawn talks to Sunny the next morning and tries to understand, but really can't. She's a little cold to Sunny, but Sunny's okay with it. Sunny faces her parents and they at least listen to her and try to be understanding, which is all Sunny wanted in the first place. Sunny laments that nothing will ever be "normal" again.
That's all she wrote! I'm not sure when I'll do #3 - Maggie because my copy is pretty messed up and I might need a new one. I have to check. I may start on #4 - Amalia or I may do some of my library books.
*If you get this joke, congratulations, you're a 90s pop-culture vulture. If not, it's from Daria, the best show ever.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
California Diaries #1: Dawn
September 26 begins with a soliloquy on friends and school. Dawn is "distracted" in school because the Vista middle school is ubercrowded. The Vista campus contains a big building for the high school grades (9-12), a medium-sized building for the elementary grades (K-4) and a small building for the middle school (5-8). This is the first time I've ever heard of fifth grade in middle school. Our fifth grade was set up like a middle school, but was in an elementary building. But I digress, just like Dawn. Up next is exposition about Sunny's terminally ill mother, which is the part of this series I despise (because it hits way too close to home, but that's for later). Then we find out Maggie's rich. I always wondered if rich people actually have tennis courts in their backyards or if that's just a cliche. Now comes an infodump of Dawn backstory. Mom and Dad are divorced, Mom moved Dawn and Jeff to CT when Dawn was 12 (ah, the days when time advanced in Stoneybrook), Mom got remarried (to Richard Spier, who is not identified in the passage), then Dad got remarried to Carol. Apparently journal-keeping was so important to Dawn that we've never heard about it until this moment. Then onto introducing Maggie and explaining how she turned from laid-back green-haired rebel to uptight control-freak perfectionist. Last we get an intro to Jill, who is wearing a unicorn sweatshirt that would be considered the height of cool in Sweet Valley. More crap about how crowded the school is. Sunny shouts "Rulers!" in the hallway and Dawn responds in kind. I hate to say it, but my friends and I totally would have done that, except we were the lowliest geeks on the eighth grade totem pole and therefore would have only been rulers of the band room. And finally September 26 ends.
September 27. The eighth-graders are told to report to an assembly at the high school with all the high school students. They are (somewhat understandably) freaked. They're all in awe of the size of the high school students. They're "real adults." Apparently they've never seen a 13-year-old guy who's 6'4" or girl who has 38D boobs (yes, those both exist). The big announcement is that the eighth grade is being moved to the high school building to alleviate the overcrowding problem. Dawn is sad that they won't be Rulers anymore. Honey, you weren't "rulers" to begin with--you were just lame.
September 28. Dad announces he's going on a ten-day business trip to Toledo. Talk about lame. Dawn is upset that he won't be there to morally support her during the first day of "high school". I forget that this is before cell phones became ubiquitous and she would have had to pay long distance rates to call him in Toledo. Dawn whines that he's "abandoning" her in her time of need. Drama queen much? Carol offers her services, but bratty Dawn thinks it's not the same. The anti-Carol plot was annoying in "California Girls" and it's really annoying here. I understand that disliking people for no reason is a typically teenage thing to do, but that doesn't make it any less stupid. Like when Dawn asks Carol what "sterile" means and Carol giggles. I always took that as Carol being nervous about explaining a sexual concept to her 13-year-old stepdaughter, whom she doesn't know very well. Dawn takes it as Carol being "immature." I seem to recall Carol being either a little younger or the same age as Jack, and Jack is no older than 40 and probably closer to 35. None of the 35-year-olds I know are paragons of maturity. Still, I think Dawn's reaching.
September 29. First day of high school. Dawn's all impressed that there's a special room devoted to study hall. I must say, I kind of thought that was cool when I first read this, because we didn't have anything like that. Our study halls were either in the cafeteria, the auditorium, or this multi-level classroom that also housed driver's ed. Amalia is mentioned and Ducky is described but not named. The teacher leaves the room and two seniors start making out. Dawn stares, because the BSC's idea of PDA is holding hands. Then Dawn says hell! Dude, I know! I didn't think she was that cool either. A couple of minor hazing incidents have taken place. Maggie has the hots for Justin Randall, a junior. Carol's big secret is foreshadowed.
October 1. Dawn tries to open her locker and can't. She punches and kicks the door. The locker's actual owner, megabitch Mandy Richards, accuses Dawn of trying to break in to her locker. Turns out Dawn broke a mirror. Dawn goes to pay Mandy for the mirror and opens her purse to find a stuffed puppy. Mandy grabs it and Dawn tells her off. Mandy notices the note on the puppy's tail and reads it out loud. "Here is a little good-luck friend for you. Keep it with you always. Your puppy pal, Jill." Dawn is so embarrassed that she turns tail and runs. I can't really blame her. Dawn goes home and gets all defensive when Carol asks her about homework. Dawn notices that Carol is exhausted. Hey, look, it's Foreshadowing with a baseball ba--oww!. The next day, there's crap about Jeff that I don't care about. There's also a little about dissolving the We [Heart] Kids Club.
October 3. Dawn gets a note in her locker inviting her to an exclusive party. Maggie and Sunny received the same invitation. Sunny and Maggie list girls they know who didn't get one, and they mention a Lucinda and a Polly. Would it kill Ann to pick up a baby-name book that was written during the twentieth century? At luch Dawn finds out Jill got an invitation. They theorize that Jill got invited because she's friends with Dawn, Sunny and Maggie. Jill balks at going to a party with juniors and seniors. She also has quite possibly the best clueless-middle-schooler line ever:
October 4--party day. Sunny, Maggie and Dawn are debating whether to attend. They realize their parents will never go for it, so Jill suggests they "have [their] own party." They hit the mall for party supplies. Jill has a list of what they need and it's as lame as you'd imagine. Sunny detours them to the jewelry store (I'm guessing it's a Claire's rather than a Zale's) and thinks out loud about getting more holes punched in her ears, or belly button, or eyebrows. After that they head to the pet store so Maggie can buy stuff for the menagerie she keeps because she wants to be a vet. Sunny and Jill bond over hamsters and Dawn gets the warm fuzzies. Then Jill insists on going to The Bear Necessities, which sounds like Boyd's crossed with Five Below. Jill buys teddy bear stickers, teddy bear barrettes, and a sparkly pony perfume bottle. Sunny rolls her eyes so hard they get stuck that way. Kidding! Then they go for lunch and Sunny bursts into tears because her mom can hardly eat anymore. I'm quoting the whole thing because I think it's the most realistic thing that happens in this whole book:
Jill's sleepover. Sunny and Dawn arrive first. Maggie arrives in the limo and the pizza guy asks Jill if she's famous. Maggie pouts because she hates people knowing she's rich. As someone who makes in a year what her father makes in a day, I say: bite me, princess. Anyway, Jill has decorated her room with pink and white streamers and balloons and a "Back to School" sign. I can't imagine going that all out for a sleepover with friends I'd known for years. In my world, sleepovers involved unfinished basements, futons, and massive amounts of food. But I digress. Jill wants to watch Disney movies on the VCR she borrowed from her mom. It turns out this is the least lame idea of Jill's. She then suggests prank-calling the neighbors, playing Cootie, and makeovers. Wow. I can't decide if playing Cootie is lamer than role-playing Star Trek, which is how my eighth-grade friends and I spent sleepovers. The girls find out that Jill's mom and sister are leaving. Sunny wants to walk to the "real" party. The figure out that they can stay for an hour and get home before Mrs. Henderson gets back. Jill pouts, of course, but can't stop them.
Our Heroines arrive at the party. They don't know whose house it is. There's a swimming pool in the backyard, and kids are "making out on floats." Eighth-graders are standing around awkwardly trying to imitate the "big kids." A guy offers Sunny cigarettes and Dawn sticks her self-righteous nose in and tells the guy that Sunny doesn't smoke because her mom's dying of lung cancer. Maggie seems to admire Dawn for this. I want to slap Maggie, who usually has more sense than that. I also want to punch Dawn in her smug, self-satisfied face. Next the three of them get offered alcohol. Sunny shotguns hers and goes for more. Dawn spits hers out because it tastes like "strawberries and insect repellent." Ha, they're drinking Arbor Mist! I had a girlfriend who would only drink Arbor Mist blackberry and vodka. Also, I must admit that Dawn's description is not too far off from my first impressions of $10-a-liter vodka, which I stole from my college roommate. Watering that shit down improved it significantly. It tasted like acetone. Anyway, they talk to Amalia for a little, during which Sunny returns totally smashed. I really don't think it's realistic for Sunny to be as drunk as she's portrayed in the short amount of time that passes, but I didn't have my first drink until I was seventeen, so maybe it works differently if you're younger? I don't know. They make fun of Sunny's drunk talk.
Half an hour passes, and Sunny comes back looking for the "barfroom". Mandy cheers and Dawn realizes that the party planners were hoping the eighth-graders would drink enough to get sick. Sunny pukes in the bushes. Dawn gets worried because it's getting late and they still have to walk all the way back to Jill's, which is going to be much harder with Sunny having alcohol poisoning and all. They let Sunny lay down and Dawn tries to plan their next move. Suddenly the music gets really loud and the older kids start throwing the eighth-graders in the pool. Dawn and Maggie get tossed in at the same time. Maggie won't get out because she's wearing a thin t-shirt with no bra. Dawn comments that Maggie should always (emphasis hers) wear a bra. I'm one of those girls too, always have been, and I resented it like hell. Still, I wore the damn bra because it was too uncomfortable not to. However, the whole bra situation was contrived to get Justin to judge Maggie's private wet t-shirt contest. He, of course, gives her a 10. Maggie and Dawn find Sunny and argue about how to get home.
Meanwhile, the high-schoolers ditch the party and the fuzz shows up. Maggie sprints for the woods behind the house and Dawn and Sunny follow. As soon as they're relatively safe, Sunny begs them to slow down. They finally find a road that isn't the one they need to be on. Amalia catches up to them as they try to figure out where they need to go. Then Mr. Knight In Shining Armor pulls over to help them. He recognizes Dawn and Amalia from study hall. Meanwhile, Sunny realizes she's lost her wallet. They blabber nervously for a while before Ducky shuts them up and gets them in his car. Introductions are made. Sunny has to sit up front because she still feels sick, and Ducky rolls the window down for her. He gives them a little infodump about his absentee family and his ancient car. He drops Amalia off first. Then he takes Our Heroines home and offers to pick them up the next morning so they can look for Sunny's wallet.
Sunny barfs in front of Jill's house and Jill sees her. Jill lets them in and yells at them for being out so late and causing her to lie to her mom. The girls fill Jill in on what happened at the party. Jill whines some more about lying and covering up and other stuff that nobody cares about, and Sunny yells at her for making it all about her. Maggie calls off the argument and suggests they all go to bed. Sunny passes out on Jill's bed. The girls don't know what to do because this was written in 1997 and only 20% of Americans were using the Internet. They try to wake Sunny up but they can't, so they just let her go. They're really lucky she didn't pull a Jimi Hendrix. That's way too daring for AMM, though.
Jill's mom and sister wake the girls up at 8:00 am for breakfast. Sunny is totally hungover and can barely get out of bed. Jill takes the self-righteousness crown from Dawn by tsking at Sunny's hungover state. Sunny miraculously makes it through breakfast without puking or passing out again and returns to Jill's bed at the first opportunity. When Ducky picks them up three hours later, Sunny's much better. Dawn calls Ducky's Buick a junk pile. What, you don't remember the Junk Bucket? For shame! When they get to the house, they're greeted by the female owner, who has Sunny's wallet. They find out her name is Ms. Krueger and she's Ducky's teacher at Vista. Ducky gives Ms. Krueger the inside scoop on the party and Dawn realizes it was a trick. Later, Ducky flat-out tells them they were hazed. This is a hundred percent better than AMM's last hazing story.
Dawn meets Jill at The Bear Necessities and apologizes for ditching her. Jill acts mature for her age for the first time in 100+ pages. She's a little self-righteous, but I'm gonna have to let it slide because she's right. Then Dawn tells Jill about Carol being pregnant. Apparently Dawn's wearing her Bad Idea Jeans instead of her usual Mom jeans.
October 6. An 8th-12th grade assembly is called for the next morning at 10:00 am. Attendance is mandatory. The school is pissed. Ms. Krueger wants to see Dawn, Sunny, and Ducky in her office before the assembly. Dawn wants to hang out with her friends that afternoon. Jill is the only one who takes her up on it. Jill comes over to bake cookies and lets it spill that she knows about Carol. Dawn gets pissed at Jill for telling rather than taking the blame for telling Jill in the first place. This is why I don't want kids--they turn into teenagers. Dawn uses the incident to force Carol to tell Jack about the baby.
October 7. Dawn, Sunny and Ducky report to Ms. Krueger's office as ordered. They win a private lecture about the dangers of sneaking out, walking alone in the dark, drinking alcohol at age 13, and not being able to contact help because the house was locked. I call bullshit on the last one because they're in southern California and everybody's upper middle to upper upper class, so at least one of the eighth-graders would have had a cell phone, even in 1997. Anyway, Ms. Krueger puts them on notice and lets them go. They report to the assembly. The admins give them a standard responsibility lecture and tell them that $2000 of damage was done to Ms. Krueger's property and class funds will be used to repay her. The freshmen and juniors don't have quite enough money, so they'll have to fundraise the rest. The rest of the classes will only have enough money for their end-of-year trip. Also, they warn everybody that further hazing will not be tolerated. After that, things pretty much go back to normal. Dawn regrets losing Jill as a friend but is glad that she met Ducky and Amalia.
And there it is! Man, that was long. Hope y'all enjoyed it.
September 27. The eighth-graders are told to report to an assembly at the high school with all the high school students. They are (somewhat understandably) freaked. They're all in awe of the size of the high school students. They're "real adults." Apparently they've never seen a 13-year-old guy who's 6'4" or girl who has 38D boobs (yes, those both exist). The big announcement is that the eighth grade is being moved to the high school building to alleviate the overcrowding problem. Dawn is sad that they won't be Rulers anymore. Honey, you weren't "rulers" to begin with--you were just lame.
September 28. Dad announces he's going on a ten-day business trip to Toledo. Talk about lame. Dawn is upset that he won't be there to morally support her during the first day of "high school". I forget that this is before cell phones became ubiquitous and she would have had to pay long distance rates to call him in Toledo. Dawn whines that he's "abandoning" her in her time of need. Drama queen much? Carol offers her services, but bratty Dawn thinks it's not the same. The anti-Carol plot was annoying in "California Girls" and it's really annoying here. I understand that disliking people for no reason is a typically teenage thing to do, but that doesn't make it any less stupid. Like when Dawn asks Carol what "sterile" means and Carol giggles. I always took that as Carol being nervous about explaining a sexual concept to her 13-year-old stepdaughter, whom she doesn't know very well. Dawn takes it as Carol being "immature." I seem to recall Carol being either a little younger or the same age as Jack, and Jack is no older than 40 and probably closer to 35. None of the 35-year-olds I know are paragons of maturity. Still, I think Dawn's reaching.
September 29. First day of high school. Dawn's all impressed that there's a special room devoted to study hall. I must say, I kind of thought that was cool when I first read this, because we didn't have anything like that. Our study halls were either in the cafeteria, the auditorium, or this multi-level classroom that also housed driver's ed. Amalia is mentioned and Ducky is described but not named. The teacher leaves the room and two seniors start making out. Dawn stares, because the BSC's idea of PDA is holding hands. Then Dawn says hell! Dude, I know! I didn't think she was that cool either. A couple of minor hazing incidents have taken place. Maggie has the hots for Justin Randall, a junior. Carol's big secret is foreshadowed.
October 1. Dawn tries to open her locker and can't. She punches and kicks the door. The locker's actual owner, megabitch Mandy Richards, accuses Dawn of trying to break in to her locker. Turns out Dawn broke a mirror. Dawn goes to pay Mandy for the mirror and opens her purse to find a stuffed puppy. Mandy grabs it and Dawn tells her off. Mandy notices the note on the puppy's tail and reads it out loud. "Here is a little good-luck friend for you. Keep it with you always. Your puppy pal, Jill." Dawn is so embarrassed that she turns tail and runs. I can't really blame her. Dawn goes home and gets all defensive when Carol asks her about homework. Dawn notices that Carol is exhausted. Hey, look, it's Foreshadowing with a baseball ba--oww!. The next day, there's crap about Jeff that I don't care about. There's also a little about dissolving the We [Heart] Kids Club.
October 3. Dawn gets a note in her locker inviting her to an exclusive party. Maggie and Sunny received the same invitation. Sunny and Maggie list girls they know who didn't get one, and they mention a Lucinda and a Polly. Would it kill Ann to pick up a baby-name book that was written during the twentieth century? At luch Dawn finds out Jill got an invitation. They theorize that Jill got invited because she's friends with Dawn, Sunny and Maggie. Jill balks at going to a party with juniors and seniors. She also has quite possibly the best clueless-middle-schooler line ever:
Oh, Jill. This reminds me so much of my middle school "best friend." Dawn talks about how she should feel protective of Jill, but she just feels annoyed. I find that I really can't blame her. Dawn talks about how she's not always a very good person. I much prefer this Dawn to the Dawn of "Dawn Saves the Planet". I just wish she'd remember this in her later diaries. I blame the ghostwriters. Anyway, Dawn eavesdrops on Carol's phone call and finds out Carol's pregnant. Carol is not exactly thrilled, but Dawn is too dense to figure out why. Carol makes an excuse about Jack being away to explain her lack of enthusiasm. Apparently Dawn has never watched TV or seen non-Disney movies, because she has no clue why Carol wouldn't exactly be jumping up and down at the prospect of being pregnant.We can't show up at a party empty-handed. My mom says [sic]. We can bake cookies. Or make fudge.
October 4--party day. Sunny, Maggie and Dawn are debating whether to attend. They realize their parents will never go for it, so Jill suggests they "have [their] own party." They hit the mall for party supplies. Jill has a list of what they need and it's as lame as you'd imagine. Sunny detours them to the jewelry store (I'm guessing it's a Claire's rather than a Zale's) and thinks out loud about getting more holes punched in her ears, or belly button, or eyebrows. After that they head to the pet store so Maggie can buy stuff for the menagerie she keeps because she wants to be a vet. Sunny and Jill bond over hamsters and Dawn gets the warm fuzzies. Then Jill insists on going to The Bear Necessities, which sounds like Boyd's crossed with Five Below. Jill buys teddy bear stickers, teddy bear barrettes, and a sparkly pony perfume bottle. Sunny rolls her eyes so hard they get stuck that way. Kidding! Then they go for lunch and Sunny bursts into tears because her mom can hardly eat anymore. I'm quoting the whole thing because I think it's the most realistic thing that happens in this whole book:
Dawn decides to be extra nice to Sunny. Yeah, that's really gonna last. In fact, it only takes 7 paragraphs for Dawn to become her usual holier-than-thou self. Sunny disappears and comes back with a belly button ring. Welcome to the AMMiverse. Parental permission? What's that?And I remembered the last time I visited her in the hospital. Thursday, I guess. And she had said she was actually hungry, that for once she was looking forward to her dinner, even if it was a hospital meal. And then her food came and she couldn't eat it after all. She just looked at it. Then she said the smell was making her sick, so Dad took her tray out in the hall. [...] And here I am stuffing my face. It is so unfair. Mom weighs like a hundred pounds. She looks like a stupid skeleton.
Jill's sleepover. Sunny and Dawn arrive first. Maggie arrives in the limo and the pizza guy asks Jill if she's famous. Maggie pouts because she hates people knowing she's rich. As someone who makes in a year what her father makes in a day, I say: bite me, princess. Anyway, Jill has decorated her room with pink and white streamers and balloons and a "Back to School" sign. I can't imagine going that all out for a sleepover with friends I'd known for years. In my world, sleepovers involved unfinished basements, futons, and massive amounts of food. But I digress. Jill wants to watch Disney movies on the VCR she borrowed from her mom. It turns out this is the least lame idea of Jill's. She then suggests prank-calling the neighbors, playing Cootie, and makeovers. Wow. I can't decide if playing Cootie is lamer than role-playing Star Trek, which is how my eighth-grade friends and I spent sleepovers. The girls find out that Jill's mom and sister are leaving. Sunny wants to walk to the "real" party. The figure out that they can stay for an hour and get home before Mrs. Henderson gets back. Jill pouts, of course, but can't stop them.
Our Heroines arrive at the party. They don't know whose house it is. There's a swimming pool in the backyard, and kids are "making out on floats." Eighth-graders are standing around awkwardly trying to imitate the "big kids." A guy offers Sunny cigarettes and Dawn sticks her self-righteous nose in and tells the guy that Sunny doesn't smoke because her mom's dying of lung cancer. Maggie seems to admire Dawn for this. I want to slap Maggie, who usually has more sense than that. I also want to punch Dawn in her smug, self-satisfied face. Next the three of them get offered alcohol. Sunny shotguns hers and goes for more. Dawn spits hers out because it tastes like "strawberries and insect repellent." Ha, they're drinking Arbor Mist! I had a girlfriend who would only drink Arbor Mist blackberry and vodka. Also, I must admit that Dawn's description is not too far off from my first impressions of $10-a-liter vodka, which I stole from my college roommate. Watering that shit down improved it significantly. It tasted like acetone. Anyway, they talk to Amalia for a little, during which Sunny returns totally smashed. I really don't think it's realistic for Sunny to be as drunk as she's portrayed in the short amount of time that passes, but I didn't have my first drink until I was seventeen, so maybe it works differently if you're younger? I don't know. They make fun of Sunny's drunk talk.
Half an hour passes, and Sunny comes back looking for the "barfroom". Mandy cheers and Dawn realizes that the party planners were hoping the eighth-graders would drink enough to get sick. Sunny pukes in the bushes. Dawn gets worried because it's getting late and they still have to walk all the way back to Jill's, which is going to be much harder with Sunny having alcohol poisoning and all. They let Sunny lay down and Dawn tries to plan their next move. Suddenly the music gets really loud and the older kids start throwing the eighth-graders in the pool. Dawn and Maggie get tossed in at the same time. Maggie won't get out because she's wearing a thin t-shirt with no bra. Dawn comments that Maggie should always (emphasis hers) wear a bra. I'm one of those girls too, always have been, and I resented it like hell. Still, I wore the damn bra because it was too uncomfortable not to. However, the whole bra situation was contrived to get Justin to judge Maggie's private wet t-shirt contest. He, of course, gives her a 10. Maggie and Dawn find Sunny and argue about how to get home.
Meanwhile, the high-schoolers ditch the party and the fuzz shows up. Maggie sprints for the woods behind the house and Dawn and Sunny follow. As soon as they're relatively safe, Sunny begs them to slow down. They finally find a road that isn't the one they need to be on. Amalia catches up to them as they try to figure out where they need to go. Then Mr. Knight In Shining Armor pulls over to help them. He recognizes Dawn and Amalia from study hall. Meanwhile, Sunny realizes she's lost her wallet. They blabber nervously for a while before Ducky shuts them up and gets them in his car. Introductions are made. Sunny has to sit up front because she still feels sick, and Ducky rolls the window down for her. He gives them a little infodump about his absentee family and his ancient car. He drops Amalia off first. Then he takes Our Heroines home and offers to pick them up the next morning so they can look for Sunny's wallet.
Sunny barfs in front of Jill's house and Jill sees her. Jill lets them in and yells at them for being out so late and causing her to lie to her mom. The girls fill Jill in on what happened at the party. Jill whines some more about lying and covering up and other stuff that nobody cares about, and Sunny yells at her for making it all about her. Maggie calls off the argument and suggests they all go to bed. Sunny passes out on Jill's bed. The girls don't know what to do because this was written in 1997 and only 20% of Americans were using the Internet. They try to wake Sunny up but they can't, so they just let her go. They're really lucky she didn't pull a Jimi Hendrix. That's way too daring for AMM, though.
Jill's mom and sister wake the girls up at 8:00 am for breakfast. Sunny is totally hungover and can barely get out of bed. Jill takes the self-righteousness crown from Dawn by tsking at Sunny's hungover state. Sunny miraculously makes it through breakfast without puking or passing out again and returns to Jill's bed at the first opportunity. When Ducky picks them up three hours later, Sunny's much better. Dawn calls Ducky's Buick a junk pile. What, you don't remember the Junk Bucket? For shame! When they get to the house, they're greeted by the female owner, who has Sunny's wallet. They find out her name is Ms. Krueger and she's Ducky's teacher at Vista. Ducky gives Ms. Krueger the inside scoop on the party and Dawn realizes it was a trick. Later, Ducky flat-out tells them they were hazed. This is a hundred percent better than AMM's last hazing story.
Dawn meets Jill at The Bear Necessities and apologizes for ditching her. Jill acts mature for her age for the first time in 100+ pages. She's a little self-righteous, but I'm gonna have to let it slide because she's right. Then Dawn tells Jill about Carol being pregnant. Apparently Dawn's wearing her Bad Idea Jeans instead of her usual Mom jeans.
October 6. An 8th-12th grade assembly is called for the next morning at 10:00 am. Attendance is mandatory. The school is pissed. Ms. Krueger wants to see Dawn, Sunny, and Ducky in her office before the assembly. Dawn wants to hang out with her friends that afternoon. Jill is the only one who takes her up on it. Jill comes over to bake cookies and lets it spill that she knows about Carol. Dawn gets pissed at Jill for telling rather than taking the blame for telling Jill in the first place. This is why I don't want kids--they turn into teenagers. Dawn uses the incident to force Carol to tell Jack about the baby.
October 7. Dawn, Sunny and Ducky report to Ms. Krueger's office as ordered. They win a private lecture about the dangers of sneaking out, walking alone in the dark, drinking alcohol at age 13, and not being able to contact help because the house was locked. I call bullshit on the last one because they're in southern California and everybody's upper middle to upper upper class, so at least one of the eighth-graders would have had a cell phone, even in 1997. Anyway, Ms. Krueger puts them on notice and lets them go. They report to the assembly. The admins give them a standard responsibility lecture and tell them that $2000 of damage was done to Ms. Krueger's property and class funds will be used to repay her. The freshmen and juniors don't have quite enough money, so they'll have to fundraise the rest. The rest of the classes will only have enough money for their end-of-year trip. Also, they warn everybody that further hazing will not be tolerated. After that, things pretty much go back to normal. Dawn regrets losing Jill as a friend but is glad that she met Ducky and Amalia.
And there it is! Man, that was long. Hope y'all enjoyed it.
Intro Post
Welcome to my California Diaries blog. I'm going to be recapping/reviewing/snarking on Ann M. Martin's* "mature" follow-up series to The Baby-Sitters Club. Eating disorders, abusive boyfriends**, underage drinking, suicide--these books were just a barrel of laughs, weren't they?
I may throw in a few other books from time to time, if I can find the ones I was forced to give away before moving out of my parents' house. I'd love to do the Saddle Club. They had some pretty ridiculous "very special episode" books. I also have to check the library for that Christian drug-addiction short series I remember reading a couple years ago.
A little about me: I'm 25, which makes me a proud product of the 80s. I have a degree in English literature and I'm beginning a Humanities master's program in August. I love YA lit and hope to someday get a YA novel published. I am a three-time participant in Nanowrimo and I also write fanfiction, which can be found here.
I hope to get the first CD entry up tonight.
*I wonder if AMM even reads these after they're published or if she just cashes the checks.
**And sublimated homosexuality, but that goes without saying.
I may throw in a few other books from time to time, if I can find the ones I was forced to give away before moving out of my parents' house. I'd love to do the Saddle Club. They had some pretty ridiculous "very special episode" books. I also have to check the library for that Christian drug-addiction short series I remember reading a couple years ago.
A little about me: I'm 25, which makes me a proud product of the 80s. I have a degree in English literature and I'm beginning a Humanities master's program in August. I love YA lit and hope to someday get a YA novel published. I am a three-time participant in Nanowrimo and I also write fanfiction, which can be found here.
I hope to get the first CD entry up tonight.
*I wonder if AMM even reads these after they're published or if she just cashes the checks.
**And sublimated homosexuality, but that goes without saying.
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